The Great plan
by Ink sunset
Summary: Sasha has a plan. It involves Eren. And Mikasa. Well, doesn't this bode well? Eremika.
1. Council of war

Sasha's great plan

A/N: Hey guys! First story, but I plan to take it a long way. Well, more than one chapter at least... This was brought about by the reading of _The Eremika plan _by _adventuregirl101_. I would strongly advise you check it out, it's pretty good. If you're reading this, please don't be mad that I took your idea. This is merely my take on that. You can have all the rights. Don't kill me.

_Chapter one: Council of war _

Levi arrived last, pulling up a chair. The rest were all arrayed before him. At the head of the table, Sasha, hunched over conspiratorially. Levi had to lean in to hear what she was saying.

"We're all here? Good. Then I declare this council open!" "Hurry it up, brats, I've got somewhere to be" "Oi, no need for the insults!" "tch." "Right. Guys. Some of you may be wondering why two notable members of our group aren't here. That is because this is of utmost importa-"

Sasha stopped to shove a piece of bread into her mouth "-mmmm, that's good. Yeah, as I was saying, this is of utmost importance. What have you noticed about Eren and-Mmmm, nothing like hot bread- Mikasa?"

Connie scratched his head "I dunno, not much has changed really"

Sasha stared at him then clubbed him with half a loaf of bread "That skull is hollow, Springer!" "Hey! Not all of us are conspiracy theorists like you, Blouse!"

Historia butted in before it came to blows "I think Connie's right. Not much seems to change with them"

Sasha tore madly at her hair "Ye gods! I am surrounded by blind fools!" "And I am surrounded by idiotic brats" muttered Levi, making to leave "Wait! Listen, I think we can all tell that Mikasa cares for Eren, no?"

There were general murmurs of assent from around the table

"I have reason to believe that Eren reciprocates."

A few questioning glances

"Here is my plan..."

X X X

Eren wandered downstairs, having cleaned the rooms. A large, vibrant poster was on the wall, and pretty much everyone he knew was around it. Sasha was standing in the middle of the crowd, beckoning on one and all. Eren moved to look at the poster. It said:

"SASHA'S DISCO! EVERYONE INVITED!

And you know what happens if you turn down one of my invitations...

FOOD APLENTY! LOTS OF FOOD! SERIOUSLY, METRIC TONS OF FOOD!

Make sure you're there, with a partner"

Eren looked about. Sasha noticed him

"Ereeeeen! You're late! Barely any partners left. Look around, everyone has a partner!"

Eren looked around. Sasha was with Connie, Historia with Armin and-wait, what?! Jean was with Levi?! And they were both sweating extremely too.

"So, Eren, once you've found a partner come to me, and I'll give you a ticket. Each pair has a different coloured ticket. Oh, there's only one left. WHO HASN'T GOT A PARTNER?"

At that moment Mikasa came downstairs looking very confused.

X X X

Jean cursed under his breath. Why did he have to go through all this for the sake of that...that...moron?! a whole disco, with LEVI none the less. Damn Eren. Damn Sasha.

X X X

Sasha grinned wickedly behind Eren. It was all working brilliantly. She hurried over to the confused Mikasa and explained the situation. Once Mikasa understood, she took a deep breath and fired her bombshell

"As it happens, Eren is the only other guy remaining, and it has to be a boy with a girl"

"Really? What about Jean and Levi?"

"Errrm... People are allowed to be queer if they want!"

She withered under Levi's death gaze

"C'mon. Quick"

X X X

Eren wandered around. Everyone had a ticket. He was resigned to leaving and dealing with Sasha's rage when she ran up to him, Mikasa in hand.

"Eren! I found the last partner for you!"

"Thanks so much..."

"I'll go now. Here are your tickets!"

Eren stared down at his ticket, which was pink and covered in hearts. He had an inkling suspicion about this.

"Hey Connie, let's see your ticket"

"Wha-! Oh..er...sure, I guess"

Connie's ticket was green and had bunnies on it

"Jean, what's your ticket like?"

Jean groaned and thrusted it at Eren. It was rainbow coloured...

A/N: First chapter! I know the summary says romance/humour, but my layout is this: Plan, which is humour, then the carrying out of the plan, which is romance and humour. So, How do you guys like it? Comment, Review, and all the other good stuff! Flames will be dealt with as such: If there is even a slight bit of advice, I'll accept it and work on it. If not, I'LL DESTROY THE LITTLE BASTARDS! *Hem. Hem* Sorry. Bye now


	2. Operation sparkle storm

Ooh damn, forgot the disclaimers last time. Luckily I haven't been sued yet so I think I still have time._DISCLAIMER!:_ I do not own 進撃の巨人 (attack on titan) I make no profits from this. This is merely a fanfiction. I make no claims to pretty much anything except the detailed plot. I do not even own the basic idea behind this fanfiction. (That belongs to _Adventuregirl101 _and her wonderful story _The Eremika plan. _If you haven't checked it out yet, why not?!) In short, I own nothing. *Sobs*Yeaaaah, now that's over and done with. Operation sparkle storm concludes and is debriefed here. Read on, loyal fans! If anyone actually reads this...

_Chapter 2: Operation sparkle storm_

Eren walked downstairs into the large mess hall which Sasha had turned into her disco hall. There were loads of lights and almost everyone Eren knew. Sasha ran up to him. "where's your partner?"

"Um..." "alright get you gone. Come back when you have your partner." And with that she shoved Eren up the stairs and ran back to the group in the middle

"That was too close. To finish, guys, just hang around whilst I do my magic. Make sure you stay in your pairs. Any questions?"

Levi raised a hand "when can I leave this half-assed attempt at a matchmaking session?"

Sasha stared at him "um... coupla minutes after Eren and Mikasa arrive, I guess"

Levi grunted.

"Right guys! Let's roll! Now where did I leave those sturgeons?"

"You went hunting?! Here?!"

"Aw, shuddup Armin! You have a problem with that?"

"You bet I d..."

XXX

Eren sat by the entrance. He was sure he could hear someone, possibly Armin and Sasha, arguing loudly. He tugged at his shirt uncomfortably. He was wearing semi-casual clothes, collared shirt, pants, etc. He resigned himself to waiting when Mikasa came walking down the stairs. She was wearing a semi-formal dress, with a red scarf. "Sorry to keep you waiting. I had to find this scarf."

"No problem."

They walked in and just like that, all conversation stopped and almost everyone looked at them.

"Um...is there a problem?"

Sasha ran up "No, no, no, of course *gulp* not" She said hurriedly, mouth full of sturgeon.

"Tickets please!"

Eren handed his pink ticket over "Ah yes, yes, I see, mhm. You're free to go. While you're at it, can you pass me a potato?"

Mikasa chucked a potato in Sasha's general direction, which she scrabbled for frantically. Eren walked around, noticing several strange things:

Firstly, nobody was doing anything much, except Sasha, who was by the food stall, shoving stuff into her mouth. Armin and Jean were also there, trying to pull her away. He could pick up some of the conversation

"Sasha, you can't eat it all!"

"Aw shuddup Arlert. We can get more from the stores."

"No, we can't! Limited supplies, remember?"

"Cut me some slack!"

Secondly, Levi was staring at his watch. He stood stock still for another 45 seconds, then yelled "120 seconds!" and made for the door. Sasha blocked him. "Move. It's been 2 minutes, which is a couple. I'm leaving."

Eren wandered over to a bench where Mikasa sat. She looked up and smiled slightly in greeting

"There's something strange going on here, don't you think?"

"Yeah, can't quite put my finger on it though."

"Something that's not so strange, though, is Levi. Look"

Mikasa looked over at Levi, who was staring boredly as Sasha waved her arms frantically and screamed at him, although they couldn't work out what she was saying.

They both chuckled.

As Levi leaved, they saw Sasha walk over to Jean, whisper to him, and thrust flowers in his hand. Eventually they decided to ignore this.

Mikasa looked around, and decided to get up and walk over to the drinks table. As she stood, however, her scarf slipped off and fell to the floor. She gasped slightly and was about to pick it up when Eren did so instead. He stood and gently wrapped it around her head.

"There you go"

"Thank you"

"Hey, I said I would wrap it around you as often as necessary, and I will do so."

Mikasa blushed and went to get some drinks just a bit faster.

Eren looked around again. He was_**sure **_that pot plant wasn't there earlier...

XXX

Jean walked over to Sasha "Done. But why _**did **_you want me to put a plant near Eren?"

"Never you mind. Have some food!"

Jean did so. Historia was also at the stall. She glanced at him

"erm...Jean, do you need to be alone for a bit?"

"What? Why would I?" He couldn't help noticing how beautiful Historia was

She indicated her head in the general direction of his crotch. He looked down. There was a large bulge there. He staggered over to Sasha "SASHA!"

Sasha looked up innocently "Yes, Jean?" Jean stopped at the sound of her honeyed voice. His head was full of indecent images of him with Sasha. He shook his head clear

"You put aphrodisiacs in those flowers, didn't you?"

"Miiiight have..."

"WHERE THE HELL DID YOU GET THOSE ANYWAY?!"

"I know the right people. Squad leader Hanji, for example. She uses the stuff in experiments. More importantly, how far away from Eren did you put those flowers?"

"oh about 15 meters?"

"Incompetent oaf! They won't have that much effect on him at that distance."

"Good! I am damn well leaving."

"Oh okay. Bye then"

Jean glared at her and stomped off

XXX

Mikasa wandered over to Eren and handed him a drink. He accepted it with a nod of thanks. He felt slightly strange. She looked around.

"I could be sure that peace lily 20 meters away wasn't there before."

"Yeah, I thought that."

Eren stared at Mikasa. Her black hair swayed in the breeze, and her eyes seemed to shine more than usual.

"Mikasa?"

"Yes, Eren?"

"You're glowing"

Mikasa blushed and pulled her scarf over her nose. "Thank you"

Eren shook his head slightly then looked around, before hurriedly changing the subject.

"Notice something strange?"

"No..."

"Sasha's not at the food stall"

XXX

Sasha poked her head up from behind a Japanese peace lily some distance away from Eren and Mikasa. She looked through her binoculars. Eren was blushing and Mikasa had her scarf over her nose.

"Yes, yes, It's all going to plan. Hehehehe"

"Um...Sasha?"

"Huh? Jean?I thought you'd left."

"I'm about to. Just thought you might like to know, That's the one with the aphrodisiacs in"

"AWK!"

XXX

The group crowded round Sasha (except Levi of course, who really didn't give a shit).

"Guys, I think we can all give ourselves pats on the back"

Sasha remembered the end of that...

Eren and Mikasa had talked all the way till near the end, when the conversation had fallen to a halt. Eren looked about. It was funny, he thought, that there was nothing to suggest that this was a 'disco' as Sasha's poster had said. He relaxed and leant back. It was actually getting quite late, and there weren't many people left. He sat next to Mikasa quite comfortably. Sasha had taken the peace lily away a good forty minutes ago, and had smashed the pot to bits and jumped on the plant repeatedly. Boy, was Levi gonna love that. He started as he felt a weight on his shoulders, but relaxed when he saw it was Mikasa leaning her head on his shoulder. She realised what she was doing and started straight, blushing furiously.

"Um...sorry, Eren. I'm just tired"

"No, no, it's no problem , feel free."

She relaxed and rested against Eren again. They remained contently like that till Levi walked in and declared the 'disco' over.

XXX

Sasha looked around "You know them, if that's happening, real progress is going! So, who has another idea?"

Jean raised his hand "I may just have one..."

A/N: Uh, oh, Jean incoming! Thanks to all those who read etc. Reviews will be taken into consideration so please do review, favourite and whatnot, all the good stuff. Bye for now! 


	3. The Kidnap

A/N: Once more unto the breach my friends! NB: Jean's plan isn't a great one, but that'll all be explained near the bottom.

_Chapter 3: The Kidnap (AKA operation humiliation)_

Eren fell onto his bed and checked the time with his pocket watch. It was past 7:00 pm. Damn him. Damn Levi and his fanaticism about cleanliness. He'd made him clean all the rooms-**thrice**. And then ditto the stables. Eren was exhausted. He breathed in and went to get some water from a bottle on the other side of his room. As he passed the door, he was sure he could hear whispering in the corridor, but he was too tired to check it out. He flopped down on his bed and soon fell asleep.

XXX

Jean, Connie, Sasha and Levi all huddled around the door. Both Historia and Armin had refused to be a part of this one but Jean would go on. He still hadn't forgotten the 'disco'as Sasha called it...

"Remind me again, how is this shitty plan supposed to help either of them in their relationship?"

Jean looked up at Levi "I thought you didn't care?" "I couldn't find a crap to give if I tried, but I **do **care if the kid goes titan, destroys this place, and forces us to lose our 'greatest weapon'. Erwin wouldn't be happy" "Heeeey, I've known him for longer than you. I know him better."

Jean looked around. It was now 8:15 pm. Jean nodded "Skeleton keys" Levi passed them 'I want them back, and clean." Jean inserted the key into the lock and twisted. Eren's door creaked open.

Jean whispered "Duct tape" Connie handed it to him. Jean cut off a bit and steadily approached Eren...

XXX

Eren was violently awoken by someone strapping Duct tape over his mouth. He rolled out of bed and lashed out at whoever it was. There was a solid crunch, and he could hear someone who sounded a lot like Jean say "Mother of god! Right in the face!" Someone kicked him down, and he could see through the darkness, Jean approaching with a large strip of cloth. He threw a couple of punches at Jean "Has Jean finally gone mad?! And besides, how the fuck did he get in here?!" His thought process was stopped when Jean yelled as his fists connected with his face. Jean leaped on him and started repeatedly punching Eren in the face. At first, Eren had the upper hand but when someone tied the thick cloth around his face, not so much. Someone tied strong hemp rope around him, and there was no longer anything he could do. He felt someone pick him up and carry him. There was a faint creaking, then Eren was deposited roughly.

XXX

Mikasa awoke to the sounds of struggling. She lit a light and held it up. Nothing could have prepared her for what she saw. There was Eren, blindfolded , tied and gagged, in her room. After a few seconds of staring she pulled a pocket knife and cut away the rope. When Eren lashed out, she whispered "It's okay, Eren. It's me, Mikasa. Don't struggle any more" A few seconds later, he stopped. She untied the blindfold, and then both she and Eren pulled off the duck tape "Yow!" Eren yelped. "Thanks Mikasa. Whe-Ah. Your room. I'll leave now." He made for the door and pulled the handle. It did not budge. Mikasa rummaged through and found her keys , then unlocked the door. It did not budge. Mikasa peered into the lock, and saw nothing but blackness. "Left a key in the lock."

Eren yelled "JEAN YOU BASTARD. OPEN THAT DOOR RIGHT NOW!" "Nothing doing old chap" "I SWEAR I WILL GO TITAN ON YOU!" "Just try it, Eren. I dare you" suddenly a voice butted in "What's going on here? And where the fuck are my skeleton keys?" "Um... we caught Eren in Mikasa's room and sooo, we used your skeleton keys to lock the door. We'll need them for the night. Can we?"

There was a long pause "Not that I give a shit about what my men are doing by night, but fine. I want them back though" "You'll get them, sir. Good night Eren!" The repeated sound of footsteps could be heard. Eren swore and slid against the wall. "Guess I'll be spending the night here. Sorry Mikasa"

Mikasa looked at him. He had a few bruises on his face and a tiny bit of blood trickled down from a split lip. She found her clean handkerchief, and knelt before him. Gently she dabbed away the blood.

"Who did this to you?" "Jean. But don't worry, until someone blindfolded me I gave as good as I got." "I think I'll kill him. Nobody does this to you and gets away with it" "Woah, Mikasa."

"I'm serious Eren. Dead serious." "Um...sure. But we've got more imminent problems."

XXX

"Right so, given this is your room, I'll sleep on the floor." "Hey, no, I don't mind, you can be on the bed" "Nah, I don't want to cause you problems." "It's no worry." She smiled for a brief instant "As if you could cause _me _any problems anyway" "Wanna bet?" She smiled slightly. "But, debate's over. You're on the bed, Eren" Mikasa pulled an extra blanket from a drawer and lay down on the floor. Eren didn't budge. "Oh come on, Eren, don't be so stubborn!" "I could say the same thing to you. It's your room" Mikasa let out an exasperated groan "Fine then, we'll both be on the floor because you're too damn stubborn to accept a good gesture." She pulled her knees up and leaned against the wall. Before long, Eren tired of walking round in circles and plonked himself down next to her. She threw the blanket over him too. Eren chucked it back over her. "Oh come **on**, Eren." Eren sighed "fine, I accept defeat" Mikasa threw the blanket over him. Before too long, they both fell asleep.

XXX

The first rays of light shone were on their faces. Mikasa awoke, then started. She and Eren were leaning against each other, snuggled under the blanket. After a moment's hesitation, she snuggled up again. Before too long, Eren awoke and yawned quietly.

"Good morning"Mikasa said quietly, lest she disturb the peace of the moment. Unfortunately, that moment didn't last long, as the sounds of a key turning in a lock could be heard. Eren jumped up, into a close combat stance. The door opened and Eren leapt at the opener with a flying kick. Levi swore and shoved a palm into Eren's chest "Get back to your room, Jaeger." Eren stalked out of the room. Levi looked at Mikasa "Breakfast's in an hour, Ackerman. You've got time"

XXX

Jean strolled off to breakfast. He felt rather smug. It had all gone so well. All these thoughts were banished from his head when a hand grabbed his mouth and he was yanked into a small side room. As he looked up, he saw Eren and Mikasa standing above him. Mikasa locked the door. Jean whimpered.

XXX

Historia looked up "Guys! I heard what Jean did. I managed to surmise the real story. Where is he?"

Eren looked at Mikasa and grinned "Oh, he's indisposed right now"

XXX

Jean shouted under the gag and wriggled. He was tied up and gagged in a storage closet. Quietly, he swore. He guessed he'd be in here for quite a while...

A/N: So that concludes this chapter. R&R, C&C, maybe even B&B! ;) Bye for now! 


	4. The Geidicht protocol

A/N: Hey guys! Before you ask, I know I said I'd explain why Jean's plan was a total pile of crap at the end of CH.3 but I'll do it here instead. P.S yes, Jean is often the butt of all jokes here. Sorry if you're a fan of him!

_Chapter 4: The Geidicht protocol_

The council was assembled once again, a certain member sporting pins and needles everywhere after 3 hours in a closet. Sasha shook her head " That plan failed. In fact", she said, glaring at Jean "I think it might have merely been Jean's way to get back at Eren, whom he blamed for certain events". Jean didn't respond. He was too busy massaging his numb hands. Sasha looked around "So, anyone else got a plan?" There were a few embarrassed disclaimers. Then Connie coughed "I might..."

XXX

Eren walked into the main mess area. Sasha and Connie were writing on pieces of paper but quickly hid them when he walked over. "What's that, guys?" "Nothing. Just nothing..." Connie stammered, blushing furiously. "Eren looked between them and smiled a knowing smile "Good luck guys" Connie frowned as Eren walked away "Does he think... we're a pair?!" Sasha grinned "This is great! Now no matter what weird stuff we do, he'll just assume it's 'us'! Connie frowned. He wasn't sure ow great this really was. Shaking his head, he pulled out the paper and continued writing.

XXX

Mikasa finished cleaning her room, and left for supper. Supper passed as normal, and Mikasa returned to her room. On her floor, there was a folded card. Curiously, she picked it up and sat down. It read, in handwriting not dissimilar to Eren's ;

_Lavenders blue dilly dilly, Lavenders green,_

_When I am king dilly dilly, __you'll be my queen_

_**Eren**_

Mikasa stared at it. Eren wouldn't do something like that. It was a prank. It must be. Some callous prank pulled on her by someone else. But then... The writing was _**so **_like Eren's. There was only one thing for it. She'd have to ask him.

XXX

Eren meandered into his room. He really didn't want to clean his room, but Levi could get very fanatical about this. He grabbed a duster and began to dust down his mantelpiece. A small piece of paper swished down to the floor. Eren grabbed it and opened it. It said;

_Roses are red, Violets are blue,_

_Eren will you realise, __I love you_

_**Mikasa**_

Eren sat stock-still on his bed. He **knew **that Mikasa wouldn't do something like **this**. He just knew. But then, if it was true...

He needed to know. He'd have to consult her.

XXX

Mikasa walked at a brisk pace down the corridor, into the common area. She saw Eren, and hurried over to him. He was, fortunately, alone, and the lounge was strangely empty. She hurried over to him and whispered "Eren, I need to talk." Eren looked up from a little piece of paper and frowned. "Oh hey, Mikasa. I need to talk too." Mikasa pulled the slip from her pocket. "This. Deposited in my room. Looks like your writing, has your name on it. Read it." Eren scanned the slip and his pupils dilated widely. "I...I didn't write this." Mikasa nodded slightly "And also, I got one too, apparently from you, Mikasa" Mikasa shook her head "Didn't write it. And I have a sneaking suspicion that the same person wrote both of them." Eren's eyes narrowed. "Hmmm..." Mikasa's head perked up.

"Do you hear a hissing?"

XXX

Sasha kept watching through the binoculars. She was currently elevated to the top of the common lounge, fixed to nothing in particular and using tonnes of gas just to keep up there in the rafters.

But she wasn't focused on that. She was looking straight down, at Eren and Mikasa below him. "Damn! They're not gonna kiss or anything." She whispered. The hissing off her gas stopped. She looked down at it. About two seconds worth of gas left. "Oh sh-"

XXX

Sasha looked up at Mikasa. "Well well well, look who was spying from above." Sasha whimpered. Eren said "she and Connie were writing on pieces of paper earlier, but I didn't realise..." Sasha whimpered again. "What was this all about?" "I can't tell you..." "Oh, I rather think you can..." Sasha screamed and made a run for it.

XXX

Mikasa stomped upstairs "She was **reaaally **lucky Levi was around" Eren grunted and nodded, then set off towards his room. Mikasa went into hers. On the table she put that little slip. Such a small slip, yet full of hopes, desires, and so much more. Wordlessly she chucked it in the bin.

XXX

Eren sat down, head in his hands. He'd known Mikasa hadn't written that, so this shouldn't be a surprise. But why was he so disappointed? It was as if ...as if he had wanted it to be true. But he...he couldn't have...damn it! Eren groaned and bent over the table. He was confused. So very confused.

A/N: And that's it for this time, folks! I'm afraid this is only going one more chapter T_T. Many thanks to all those who have read this fic. Concludes tomorrow! 


	5. Author's message

A/N: Hi! I am currently suffering writer's block as to the finish (I'm really not that great at romance :P)

But I doubt Sasha would do as little as she has done so far, so in that name, I'll be adding a few humor chapters in and around the area of the kidnap/ the Geidicht protocol.

To answer all two reviews:

Guest: Jean is essentially the guy who ends up getting the worst of everything.

MysticalHexanes: Regarding Sasha's machinations? You haven't seen anything yet :-)

Soooo, thanks for everyone who reads, reviews, etc.

Bye for now

P.S how does the idea of an Omake story based around all the really weird pairings in this story sound, e.g Jean & Levi at the disco, Sasha & Connie pretending to be together, you know the drill.


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